Inter-sexing

I have always been perplexed with the inter-sexing between my husband's group of friends. Oh wait, that sounds bad. The inter-sexing that happened before they all settled down.

Oh yes, the late teens/early 20s were good years in this group.  Per most young Carioca adults, they used to travel together to different places during holiday weekends.  The group ranged from 10 to 20 to 30 (big trips) people. And yes, they all slept with each other. No, not an orgy... or at least I've yet to hear that story. 

They were all friends, they all partied together, and if the mood struck people would pair off. So this is where it gets interesting. I know of at least 3 women that both my brother-in-law and husband have slept with... oh and another friend of theirs.  And that is basically how it is for the entire group, men and women alike.

So I asked my group class about it today. Had a bit of an awkward moment when I just blurted out "Do you all hook up with each other?" We had been talking about a trip a group of 8 friends are taking this weekend. Of course, my question wasn't very clear and they asked "The three of us?"

I'm not that blunt!  But it would be an interesting story, 2 girls and a guy, to say the least.  I clarified, no the group? 

Shocker, "Yes. It happens. We're all friends."

?

Is this common place here in Rio? YES! They said yes! Well thank goodness. I was starting to think that my husband and our friends were just a bunch of horny bastards. Ok, I still think that but at least everyone is. 

So where is the drama?  When Susy sleeps with Pedro casually and then Pedro ends up dating Susy's best friend Isabel, doesn't it get awkward?  I mean, when the girls get together to talk shop over drinks and Isabel talks about Pedro's obsession with anal, to which Susy confirms, isn't that weird?

Maybe I'm just a prude.  Maybe I'm just a drama queen.  Maybe it's both.  The class did confirm that there can be hidden drama.  Hidden being the key word. No one talks about it, it just floats around like a beer drinking elephant at all the parties. 

At the same time, this seems like a great way of having the sex you want without the risk, assuming people are careful and take the obvious tests. I may know Pedro well but I would still want him to go get that junk swabbed at the doctors before I would put it anywhere. 

And what if Susy really liked Pedro but was just playing it cool?  No no, I just want the sex too kind of game, which never works by the way. Well, I can't really say but I can't see the logic behind it.

What about you guys? Could you hang in this kind of group? Would you be the drama queen?  What about the Cariocas and Brazilians out there. Have you slept with a large majority of your friends?

The Brazilian government notices an American who used the public health system!

I received a very cool email asking if I would be interested in sharing my experience doing all prenatal care and giving birth at a public hospital.  Noticed at last!

My first and most significant memory is from the day my son was born.  It was a dramatic day, not even counting finally meeting my first born.  We arrived at 7am like planned. I was approaching my 42nd week and my doctor wanted to try to induce me.  Unlike all other hospitals in Rio, this hospital is big on vaginal births, even VBACs.

I arrived cranky and hungry (after 8 hrs without eating) and was ready to go.  Things were running late but I was already accustomed at that point. Everything runs late in Brazil, especially at anything public.  That's when the drama started.

A middle aged woman, who I'll call Sassy, came running in with her maid. She was telling everyone it's time for her labor (of course the poor thing was working up to the end) and that they needed to take care of her C-section.  I guess the baby was breech or something.  Sad fact, she didn't do her prenatal care there, which is a strict rule, and wasn't in any immediate danger so they sent her away. She was told to go to another hospital. It happens quite often at public maternity hospitals.

To say Sassy was pissed would be the understatement of the year.  She flipped out and started making calls to people she "knew" and who were "important."

One of them happened to be the boss of my doctor, Nancy, who was acting as head doctor that morning.  Nancy got that man on the phone and told him off and he agreed with Nancy. He told Sassy to hurry up and take her to another hospital.  They would call the hospital and everyone would be waiting for them.

Sassy also called the police. She wasn't having any of it. Her maid was going to deliver at that hospital if it killed... well, her maid.  It was a big drama. In all the time Sassy spent bitching, her poor maid could have gone somewhere else and delivered without drama.

So long story short, Sassy punched Dr Nancy in the face.  Dr Nancy was pissed. Sassy was processed but her maid got in.  I felt bad for her maid though. She didn't get to have someone stay with her because of the whole drama.

On the other hand, Sassy's maid was in my room and I can tell you that she was an annoying sack.  I almost dragged my C-sectioned ass over and threw her cellphone, that was ringing all day and all night at max volume, out the window.  And that was the least annoying part of her.

My induction turned into a C-section and my 7am appointment turned into a 7pm appointment.

I was waiting for my surgery in a prep room and had to go to the bathroom. The bathroom was in the birthing room.  I went in and almost fell over.  Sensory overload! There were 5 birthing beds with curtains in between but no curtains on the side where the doctor sits... on the side where the door was.

There were 5 vaginas, all in different stages of labor, staring me in the face!  At that moment, I totally understood why men aren't allowed in the birthing room.  Waaayyyy too much going on in there.

Seriously though, they had to stop allowing husbands because there were fights between men, during labor, claiming other men were checking out their lady.  I'll be the first to let them know that no one was checking that out!  It's like a car accident. Beautiful, yes, in that figurative way that means it's not really beautiful at all.

That was the first and only moment I was so happy to be having a C-section.

I will continue the story of my birthing experience in my next post.