The City Dwellers

The other night, while having beers and watching the Ballerinos pass, a friend and I started discussing my blog. Oh yes, I have some fabulously supportive friends out there who not only read my rants but also listen to them face to face. Oh the insanity of it all. 

Anyway, this friend started reading one of my favorite blogs Sara in Le Petit Village after seeing it mentioned on mine.  She was commenting on how much she enjoys it and the descriptions of 'The Villagers'. They make the blog so personal and really give us a picture into her life.  My friend asked why I don't do the same.

Well, I will most certainly lose characters after I start naming them things like 'The Douche' or 'The Commenter.' I just don't have the charm.  But then I thought, what the hell!  I'm going to do a little blog post inspired by Sara!  

 The City Dwellers:

Mr. Rant

The believer of the unbelievable, Mr. Rant is the opposite side to my coin.  He is the only person who can tell me to shut the hell up in a way that doesn't piss me off. If that isn't made for each other, I don't know what is.

The Chatter Box

The oldest of my two spawn, The Chatter Box has a gift for gab. I have no idea where he gets it from. He's always ready to laugh, joke, tease, or tell you a story.  Known for spouting off random facts, The Chatter Box is the perfect and sweetest party attraction one could birth. 

The Clown

The youngest of my spawn, he's quiet but always has a funny face, walk, or dance to bust out at any given moment. He will only kiss or hug you on his terms, but when he does it's like gold.  Easy going and adaptable, The Clown is the perfect accessory. Just keep an eye on him, he darts! 

The In-Laws

Sweet and caring and always ready to help, the in-laws are a big part of my daily life. Of course I never know when they'll stop by or what they'll bring The Chatter Box and The Clown, but they are always down for a good time.  They enjoy speaking Portuguese, beers, coffee, and long walks on the beach.

The Family

The family is a large group of people normally found gathered in herds. They are a lively bunch and, thankfully, do not scare easily.  If offered food by them, eat it. They will be offended otherwise. 

The Mommy Crew

The Mommy Crew is a group of fellow expats. They can be found in a caravan of strollers or large motor vehicles.  They will hang out at any given park or random Rio de Janeiro child friendly-ish place, usually speaking a quick English with mumbles of Portuguese when appropriate.  Some of these women speak a strange English that seems to hail from a land they called "England."  I do not judge them for that. 

The Canadian

The Canadian is a friend of mine who usually meets up with me to encourage the consumption of one too many cold beverages.  She is the releaser of "The Mom" personality and helps the "Rachel" get some quality time out.

The Lifesaver 

The lifesaver is a fabulous woman that cleans The Rant Family home. She is full of Brazilian wisdom and helps this Ranter navigate through the domestic life in Rio de Janeiro.  She also makes a mean cake!

And in dedication to the friend who inspired the post:

The Botafoguense

The Botafoguense is a Finnish wife and a friend of mine. She puts me to shame with her enthusiasm for her and her husband's soccer team, which happens to be the same as Mr. Rants.  Perfectly fluent in Portuguese, Spanish, Finnish, and ok in English, The Botafoguense raises the bar on expats like myself.  Of course she is tremendously charming, fun, entertaining, and brilliant. She can also sing. I wouldn't so gracefully accept a bar raise from anyone else. 

Photo: Thanks to http://estilovintage.blogspot.com

Rio de Janeiro takes on the Bullies.

Oh yes, I've jumped on the blogging Rio de Janeiro is in chaos bandwagon. All the cool kids are doing it. 

Seriously though, it's all around us and is impossible not to think about.  I live in Rio meaning I've never been super stoked to hear police sirens in my neighborhood. You always look to see what's going on, make sure it's something mellow. These days it makes a girl a little nervous. That oh I just peed a little in my pants nervous.  Thank goodness it's warm and laundry is drying quickly.

So that foreigner part of me is like, 'Sweet, I'm leaving in a week for Christmas in the state, I just won't come back until it's done'  Call it the survivor, Chicken Little, in me.  Of course that won't work.  I live here.  For better or worse, this is our city.

It's unfair of us, including expats, to enjoy the beach, the beer, the good times, and then run when the going gets tough.  I'm no fair weather friend! Just ask my friends. I'm just much more of a pesky little tick friend. The kind that when you think you burned it off, you realized the head is still stuck in your ass. Oh yeah, that's me.

We have a standoff happening in our city. Very classic Western movie type of standoff.  And while the sheriff hasn't always been the obvious good guy in our movie, he's probably got a back story we wouldn't understand.  And quite possibly, this is the climax of Rio's movie. This is the make it or break it, all nerds stand together against the bully kind of thing.

As difficult as that may be, if the good guys conquer all, this city will be an even better place. (note that I'm leaving out a bunch of other conditions that should change because I just don't have the time and no one wants to read a 300 page blog post).

I choose to believe what I tell my boys, the good guys will win. Why? Because good always conquers over evil.  And you know what, I consider people who light full vans and buses on fire pretty damn evil.

Sexy Momma

The ants go marching three by three, hurrah, hurrah
The ants go marching three by three, hurrah, hurrah
The ants go marching three by three,
The little one stops to climb a tree
And they all go marching down around the town

That pretty much sums up my life as a whole. It's the three of us, me and my two sons, marching around town getting stuff done. There's not much variety to our day to day life unless you count going to a different park as shaking things up. All and all, I don't mind. I think it's the little things that make a difference, i.e. the odds and ends.

I had a little thing happen yesterday. It's a very little thing so don't go and get your hopes up for some exciting story. I was winked at on the street.

Oh I know, no big deal. But here's the thing. He was hot and he wasn't old. Yes, older men can be hot sometimes but not the case with this guy. He was hot, I'd say in his late 20s or early 30s, and kind of a bad boy type. Let's also keep in mind I was cruising the street with my bad ass double stroller and my two little men. Now one could debate that this guy must be a bit of a bastard to be winking at Mommies cruising around with their kids. Also not the case. I pass this guy once or twice a day. I've always noticed that he's pleasing to glance at but that was it... until now. He winked at me!

This really means nothing. Nothing will come of it except for my boosted self-esteem. Yes, just a wink. You see, I'm a Mom. I'm just a Mom running around with my two boys. I hardly have time to brush my hair, much less worrying about collecting even the smallest bit of attention from men. Not to mention, I'm married. Then there's the whole body image thing. I'm young but I have two kids.

So approaching 30 I'm starting to feel less than what I physically was before. My body just isn't the same and I am young. It makes me feel so unattractive. I should be tight and fit. Oh sure, go to the gym, eat right, take some time for yourself, blah blah blah. Let's be honest, after kids there are things the gym and a massage aren’t going to fix. For example, the boob issue. My poor beautiful little breasts. They are now like sad little balloons. You know the ones. The forgotten balloons still hanging from the wall days later. The shriveled and sad pink things that were once voluminous but are now depressing. Well, those are my breasts. Tiny little air sacks with playdoh like nipples. I'm not even getting into the nipples.

My point being, I don't feel sexy. I can't even fathom a man looking at me and thinking about sex. Hell, I can't imagine a man looking at me and thinking about me doing his laundry. That being said, I don't suffer from low self-esteem. I suffer from a realistic view point. I have no doubt that I attract my husband or that I'm of value. I'm just not the delusional 20 yr old I was once, prancing around in little skirts and tanks thinking I’m the shit.

Point being again, after all my yammering, it made my day. A wink. I had the heart flutter... Oh I was noticed! And he's someone that doesn't have to notice me! It's that simple. Needless to say, I felt a boost of sexiness, a natural sexiness that doesn't come from make up or clothes, and I propositioned my husband. I think I can say we're both happy I was winked at.