Monday, June 28, 2010

I Dream of Waxing Vaginas.

I starting thinking about career waxers today.  I'm not talking about esthetician but Brazilian Vagina waxing laborers.

I know jobs are scarce here and you do what you have to do, but waxing?  In a practical sense, I can imagine a cousin of a girl works at Pello Menos and can get her a job.  Fair enough.  But passionate waxers? Does that exist?  I've never been waxed by a 13 year old boy so it's hard to imagine.  They are about the only people I could see finding joy in that line of work.  That would be because it's the closest they get to "that line of work".

I guess if you starting asking, you could question urologists and gynocologists too. For that matter, proctologists.  Alright, gynos get to deliver babies.  They are clear in my book. Urologists... I'm sure they do something.  Proctologists have no excuse.  By definition: a doctor specializing in diseases of the rectum and anus.  Hi, I'm Dr. So and So's wife. He gets his kicks sticking his fingers in old people's tooshies. Oh wait, I think I just explained that one.

I don't even want to think of my waxing getting any sort of kicks, although I swear it happened to me once.  No, I don't want to talk about it. Ok, I'll sum it up as some questionable finger placement. 

Moving on, when you are getting that intimate with a person, you're curious on how they started their career.  Hell, my husband had to know me for far longer than my waxer to get that deep of a look. And down here in Rio de Janeiro, they are so thorough that you'd think they are looking for a winning lotto number in there.  Needless to say, they do a damn good job.

One thing every woman who comes to Rio needs to do, is get a Brazilian wax. I'm not talking about the , "I don't take off my undies" basic wax.  You need to come and get the, "oh you haven't you passed through puberty, wait I think I found some hair!" wax. If you are going to do it, do it all the way!  It's Brazil baby.

On a serious note, go to a place that is well known and doesn't reuse the wax. I mention Pello Menos above but I read an article that named them as reusers.  The article said that boiling the wax does not kill everything and that includes HIV. I'm not a scientist and I can't say for sure.  Either way, it's really nasty to think of someone's hair covered hard wax being spread on my special parts, even if it's been boiled. Find a good place that throws that stuff out! There's one in Largo do Machado.

For a more complete explanation of Brazilian waxing, check out kajyoga


  1. Are there many gay guys in the bizness? Going hairless has long been a fashion among many in the boys into boys community. And these guys would be in it for the esthetic, not for the cheap thrillz.

    Just a thought.


  2. Yeah, it doesn't seem like the most appeasing job to me, either. But to defend proctologists, it's actually a pretty desirable career from a medical standpoint. (My boyfriend's in medical school here in Brazil.) They say the diseases are really different and interesting. There are also few emergency surgeries in the world of proctology, so the doctor can make a pretty sweet schedule for himself (like...9am-3pm and things like that, as opposed to being on call for 48 hours straight). Also, because a lot of people don't want to do it, there's less competition in the market, so you are considered a specialist and you get paid more.

    I personally wouldn't want to do it, but I can see the appeal. :)

  3. Oh Danielle, is your husband a future proctologist? ;) I"m teasing. They are useful and I can totally see the scheduling thing. I had to see one when I was pregnant. That is something I will not get into... Ok, never say never. It is a good story, surprisingly.

    that is a thought Jim! I actually found diagram, if you will, of male style penis waxing. Interesting. I had no idea!

  4. My friend's husband owns a salon in Los Angeles that offers Male Brazillian Waxing. It's by far the most popular service offered. That just leaves me wondering what they do when the guy is really hairy. Like, what if it really isn't obvious where the pubes start and the body hair begins? Go full body wax instead? It just seems like a big can of worms if you ask me.

  5. I've never found a passionate waxer, but I think everyone can report on a few professionals that are exceptionally picky on getting every single hair, even those who are not even out yet. The perfectionism bugs me, you know, a person with a magnifying glass analysing every inch of your parts. Plus, it itches.

  6. I cannot believe I found your blog and this post today. I was just discussing this topic with some people TODAY! It is baffling. Nice blog, Rachel!

  7. My mother-in-law kinda does it all at the salon. When I arrived in Brazil. I was thinking keeping up on a wax job, I recieved state side. My husband told his mother (because he tells her everything) she in turned offered one. Yikes!

  8. Wow, now that´s a whole level of intimacy with a MIL I wouldn´t know what to do with!

  9. Great post!! There is a great wax place in Rio called Depile Downtown. There is one in 'Downtown'and the other in Copa..
    Been going there for years and they don't reuse the wax...

  10. I can safely say that I've never had anything waxed, nor would like to have anything waxed - except maybe my car. LOL The very thought that wax used for "intimate areas" might get used again on someone else, just has my stomach contents threatening to leave home.