Tuesday, December 28, 2010
How to Make Money after Christmas in the States
Visiting home is not cheap. Add to that buyers remorse... Ok, I'm lying. I have no remorse over my purchases but I do wonder how we are going to pay for them.
While credit card companies are so kind, allegedly, I have to pay them back. So I'm trying to come up with a plan of attack. Here's what I came up with.
What you can do to make money, in Brazil, after blowing all yours in the US:
1. Sell your kid's new toys. That $20 toy they got at the after Christmas sale could go for a sweet R$300. Just tell the kids you lost your luggage.
2. Blackmail your family with awkward videos/pictures you took during the holidays. Tell them for a small fee, the video or pictures will not be posted online. Con to this plan, they definitely have equally degrading videos/photos of you. Think first.
3. Bring back a suitcase full of Victoria's Secret lotion and sell them in the plaza. You'll earn money and remember your Portuguese with all the transactions and arguments with the other vendors over you using their corner.
4. Sell your body. The extra holiday weight makes the less curvy American style body a bit more bootylicious and the SUPER white skin makes you exotic. Ok, maybe not true but it's a theory.
5. Rent your new adult toys out to your friends. Not the kinky ones, that wouldn't sanitary.
6. Get a second job to pay crap off. Then again, you live in Brazil. If you worked two jobs, when would you go to the beach? Drink chopp? BBQ? Priorities people.
7. Go on a game show!
Well, that's all I got. Can you guys think of any better ideas?