Thursday, April 14, 2011

Rio de Janeiro Realtors: The Slow Road to Insanity

We are looking for apartments here in Rio de Janeiro and it is literally driving me insane! Oh and by 'we are looking' I actually mean I am doing the hustling.

Me, right here, I'm the find the golden nugget in the pile of poo girl for this family. And that's ok. Really, I'm a bit creepy in that I like to poke around other people's apartments. I enjoy seeing what's on the market and how people live.

So the actual physical looking isn't that bothersome. It's the male Realtors. No they are not sexually harassing me. Apparently that ship has sailed and I'm officially an old married lady.  It's the fact that they need to talk to the penis of the household.

I swear to you, if one more of these little bastards asks to call and talk to Mr. Rant "just to touch base," I'm going to hit someone. And you know what, I'm going to hit them with my penis! That's right, this girl right here is the one who has the "penis" in the household!

While my husband is a "Man," I am the woman. Happy wife = happy life. Let's face it, we women have a lot of decision power in the relationship.

And I've obviously have had it up to here with the need Realtors feel to call my husband. That's why I got annoyed with the Realtor yesterday. He was insisting that he should call and get to know my husband. Just have a little chat on the phone and invite Mr. Rant to his office. It started to sound like he was looking for a new bromance or something.

When I asked why, he said so that Mr. Rant knows who is showing me apartments. So my husband feels secure with our interactions.

Too bad I don't have a governess. Life would be so much easier.

I then asked if he thought my husband didn't trust me. It was really unfair of me, I know, but it pisses me off. At the same time, I like to blame Mr. Rant when I don't want to give a definite answer. "I must check with my husband and see if that paperwork is available." Or, "I'm not sure if Mr. Rant would approve of this street."

I kind of made my own bed except that they didn't give me much of an option. I am constantly being talked over. The moment I mention checking with my husband they actually listen to me. They say something like "oh that's correct(Portuguese translation). You do need to talk to him."

Yes, and I also need him to wipe my ass. You can imagine how bad it gets when he's on a business trip.

It's just the way this area seems to work. No matter how much I say or declare what I want, they only listen the moment Mr. Rant happens to answer the house phone and tells them the exact same thing.

To give them the benefit of the doubt, it may also be because I'm a foreigner. I have one sweet Realtor who insists on asking me  if I am understanding him after every two sentences. I've met up with him 3 separate times! You'd think at this point it'd be established that I understand what he's saying.

As frustrating as all this is, I'm really starting to think I may be a part of the problem. My so-called direct/indirect nature may not be suited for small-talk and interactions such as these.  I think I may just need to put on my big boy pants and run things my way. 

For example: No sir, you can not call my husband. I'm the one in charge! (more like he's really busy but we'll keep that to ourselves) 


  1. Ah, yes. I totally hear you. I even had the pool guy lament he'd never met my husband. Well, duh, dude. You come during the day. He's at work. Of course you've not met him. Now shut up and clean my pool, please. Sheesh.

    Realtors are far worse. I feel your pain. Good luck on the hunt, though!

  2. I don't know about this post, I want to comment but it just doesn't seem like original "Rantings in Rio" material, as if it weren't written by you, (gotta be careful these days, with hackers n all).
    I was wondering if you could perhaps have Mr. Rant comfirm authenticity... :-)

  3. Reader: That's funny that your pool guy said that!

    Gritty Poet: Brilliant. I will have him contact you as soon as he is available.

  4. My gosh sound so much like me it's scary! For 15 years when married I too wore the pants in this house and had the larger penis. I once told a guy when he asked if he could speak with my husband..."Excuse me? My husband doesn't have a clue as to what goes on in this house or with our money...I am the one you need to speak with thank you very much!"
    Needless to say he didn't expect that reaction nor did he know he had just pissed me off and a deadly arrrow of *bitch and sarcasm* was heading straight for his head.
    Never had another problem with him after that. Go figure.

  5. The funny thing is that my husband totally controls the money and bills. I have yet to figure out the system here, probably due to lack of trying! lol

  6. I think it's all about presence. Once I lost all my patience with people (and with it, my meek and polite girl persona), people stopped asking about Alexandre's opinion. Basically, just be "brava," and they'll know who wears the pants, (or, in this case, has the penis).

    Also, you're in Brazil! Having a governess is not totally out of the question.

  7. I think most of my students(teen students) have a governess.

    Yeah, sorry but isn't it even the rule that women control the house in Brazil?

    My husband remodeled my MIL house and designed everything. I asked him if he should consult her? He responded she will like whatever I build.

    Yikes, we don't roll like that. I need to approve of our living space and be in control or apart of the shots relating to it. Kinda an adjustment for Ricardo but now he is used to it.

  8. It looks like some folks are just stuck in the 50's mentality...I have seen these situations both in Brazil and here...
    However, I think in the US this happens much more often in the South where folks are more conservative and the 50's mentality is still very common.
    New England and California are obviously more progressive and women rule... :)