Friday, April 1, 2011

You Think Cancer but You are Just Constipated

Today will be a long day for me. This is not because I have to do anything special. It's because I'm staring at my son's blood test results and they are not right.

I have a love/hate relationship with the Brazilian method of patients bringing blood test results to the doctors. The results stare you in the face for days before someone translates them. You think you have cancer and it turns out you are just constipated.

Do they really need to do that to you?!

So my youngest's blood test is a bit off. A very sweet friend of mine on Twitter took a general look at them and said its probably anemia and a cold/infection. I figured that too. It is rational and most likely the reason.

Then comes in Google. Freaking google and it's extensive searching mechanisms. Now my irrational brain is convinced that he has acute lymphoblastic leukemia. No his platelet count is not low, but I also found out that  they can be in the normal range in 17.8% of the cases.

Damn kick ass researching skills!  I think they should add disclaimers when handing over results with some variation from the norm. Something like: "No one is dying. Nothing here is really that serious. And no you do not need to call your doctor at 7am. Office hours will be fine!"

I forgot to mention the blood in his urine. What 2 year old boy has blood in his urine?!

And while my double personality disorder continues to develop as my mind jumps from rational to crazy hypochondriac, my 2 yr old is playing like normal.

I'm positive that I'm going to bring the results in to the doctor this afternoon, slightly freaking out over what he may say, only to get a prescription for iron and vitamin C.

Then I'll feel like an ass. That goes double because I'm sharing my craziness with all of you.

Then again, assness is the far lesser evil!


  1. Blood in urine is common for urinary tract infections. With only that information I would guess the most common infection related to blood in urine. The infection can also cause discrepancies with WBC's. Don't worry (easier said than done)! Hope your day goes by fast and ends good!!


  2. I'm married to a doctor, remember? He's still new at it and eager about helping people and doing things for free. If you can't get in to the doctor today, email me w/ the symptoms (like blood in the urine)and the questionable stuff on the blood test results, and I'll show him and get back to you. He gets off at 7pm.


  3. Oh, Rachel...praying all is well!!

  4. It's just as I thought. No worries. A virus. The anemia isn't that bad so more meat (impossible as the kid eats a freaking cow a week...)

    But urine culture for the blood but he thinks it's part of the whole penis issue...

    And him being chalky/white is because I'm white. I'm offended!

  5. Wine. Have a glass of wine, or three.
    I'm sure he's fine, but I know the fear. Hang in there and know we're all thinking of him (and you).

  6. Rachel,
    I am very happy to hear that is not bad. I am a total hypochondriac myself and when it comes to my kids things get even more crazy for me. Imagine this, I used to work as a medical interpreter and, unless I was interpreting for a male with penis issues; after every appointment I worked on, I was pretty sure that I had the exactly same symptoms and same problems,from IBS, to arthritis, to scoliosis and possible mental illness.
    Anyway girl, sending good thoughts to your littlest one and to the rest of the family.

  7. Wasn't that the number 1 rule when pregnant, don't google! I think it hold true even after the kid is born. Although I have a doc appt in a few weeks where I'm sure they will tell me what a dismal failure of a mother I am, so it's always nice to feel like you Googled something to throw back at em right? Glad to hear all is well.