Monday, August 29, 2011


So the building put up a camera in the elevator. Since I'm about 50% special, I forget this every freaking time I'm in it.

For some reason I have an uncontrollable urge to check myself out in the elevator mirror when I'm in it "alone."  I check my teeth. I give that thing on my forehead a little scratch. I even pick my wedgies.

Of course right after I remember I'm being watched. Hell, the screen sits right in front of the doorman and there is nothing else for them to look at.

Today was pretty sad. For some reason I looked at myself in the mirror and was checking out my weekend belly bulge from far too much meat and such. I did the whole girl stand straight, suck it in, stick it out, and suck it back in. I even checked out my boobs.

Oh well, I guess it was a little show for the bored doorman.


  1. What floor do you work on? I don't get a change to do much more than pick my nose going up to the 5th, but thankfully our lift doesn't have a mirror or a camera. I think :)

  2. It's no wonder they avoid looking at you directly...

  3. you exhibitionist you.

    There must be much fun to be had with a camera in a lift, pretend to collapse or something. How about next time your in it take your camera and get a photo of the lift from in front of the camera, then leave it a week or so before using this photo in front of the camera so it looks like an empty lift, when you walk out into the lobby the security guard will be scratching his head for weeks and also calling you the devil woman.

    Genius! I don't know where I come up with them.

  4. Thanks for the heads up. Next time I'm in your elivator I will refrain from my embarassing practices.

  5. I think that is really awesome because those doorman jobs really suck, and now maybe he has something interesting to talk about over dinner when he goes home.

  6. I had the fortune to be stuck alone in a hotel elevator for an hour last week. It was 3 o'clock. I was hungry. Stuck with my lunch carryout, no silverware and very aware that most likely there was a crowd of people watching my every move!