Friday, September 24, 2010
1950s fit me just fine
I believe in Mothers and wives. Not just the normal oh you gave birth to a tiny person or you married someone. No, I believe in THE mother and wife that takes care of the family.
I know, I´m so 1950s poodle skirt. I can´t help it. I want to be the martyr self scarifying mother! I´m just crazy like that.
Maybe it´s because I will never forget my mother taking me to the bus stop and being there when I got off. And that, in and of itself, is what I feel a mother should be. There, always, whether you want her or not.
Of course I´m talking small children. I will not be spooning my 17 year old while he sleeps, that´d just be creepy.
But I ask you this, why is it not ok to be a stay at home Mom? Why do we get the questions "what about yourself?" "When are you going back to work?" "What about your career?"
Pardon my language but Fuck, yes with a capital F, my career. Is working really for me? Am I getting some deep spiritual gratification writing up proposals or sitting in meetings? Really people. No.
Then again, my work is not who I am. I´m not being defensive or poking at anything here. But seriously, I´ve never taken work that serious. I did my best, 110%, gold star, employee of the month work but it wasn´t who I was. I just never felt that kind of connection to a line of work. Then again, I wasn´t saving the world, in any sense.
So I don´t get why letting your husband earn the living is an issue. Because, let´s be honest, it´s an issue out there. I mean, my husband isn´t going to work worrying about what I´m teaching his kids. I could be telling them his Mother is Satin for all he knows.
I´m not by the way, I swear.
That´s the thing. I have two little future in my hands. I´m the man behind the curtain in the lives of these two little guys. So I ask you, who´s job is more important. Mr. Rant will be the first to say mine. My kids are happy, well adjusted (if you consider calling everything poop well adjusted as I do) young boys. And I take full credit. Ok, not really, I have that all star husband who comes home and helps with the kids. Only the kids. Just saying.
Anyway, I want to pick them up from school. I want to bake cookies with them afterward. I want to call and bitch to my childless friends about how nice it´d be to have just one free 24 hour period, although secretly I´d be thinking about them the entire time.
I am used and abused and am on call more than any ER doctor. 24/7 baby. And I love it. It is about the quality of life just as Jim says.
All that being said, I know a number of Moms who need to work, and they Rock! You can do it all, seriously. You may be more beaten down than JLo´s panties but it can be done. And I love them for it!
Thankfully, I don´t have to choose between life and home just yet. We can live a little leaner and stay a little Mommy happier. I think that fits just fine right about now.