Wordless Wednesday: Napping at Work

On top of a truck!

I want that Carioca job!

I can't figure out, for the life of me, what a quarter of the parents of the kids at my kids' school do for a living. Seriously, it's mind boggling.  

It reminds me of weekday Ipanema beach goers. When my parents were visiting, I took my them there on a random Tuesday morning, around 11ish. My Dad turned and asked me if it was a holiday.  Nope.  Then why in the hell aren't these people at work or school?! 

That is a good question.  Any given beautiful Rio de Janeiro day, Ipanema, Copacabana, and Leblon will be pretty full considering it's a weekday.  They can't all be students or mooching off their working parents. They can't all have won the lottery, be software geniuses retired at 35, or only work nights and weekends. 

What gives? What is the Carioca secret no one is sharing with me?! 
 
That's what's throwing me off with about 1/4 of the parents at my kids' school.  Let me explain, school starts at 1pm, middle of the workday.  The majority of these guys get dropped off by extended family or a maid, a school bus, or are in school full time. There are also a few stay-at-home parents who bring the little rug rats in. 

Then there's the magical 1/4. Sometimes the Father drops off the kid at 1pm. Sometimes the Mother.  Sometimes it's both of them.  Sometimes I see the Mother dropping off the kid and then run into the Father just cruising the neighborhood. 

No, these are not stay-at-home parents. And I don't think there are that many independently wealthy families sending their kids to our tree-hugging, hippie friendly, Harvard school of finger painting. 

So where on Earth do these people work and can my husband work there?  My husband can sometimes get off early to pick the kiddies up but no, he's not doing drop off duty or anything close to that. And the job must pay decently if they can afford the tuition.  Even with a discount, it's nothing to scoff at. 

So here is our mission.  We must discover the secret to the wandering Carioca.  How do they make their livelihood? And are they hiring? 

1950s fit me just fine

I believe in Mothers and wives.  Not just the normal oh you gave birth to a tiny person or you married someone. No, I believe in THE mother and wife that takes care of the family.

I know, I´m so 1950s poodle skirt.  I can´t help it.  I want to be the martyr self scarifying mother! I´m just crazy like that. 

Maybe it´s because I will never forget my mother taking me to the bus stop and being there when I got off.  And that, in and of itself, is what I feel a mother should be.  There, always, whether you want her or not.

Of course I´m talking small children. I will not be spooning my 17 year old while he sleeps, that´d just be creepy.

But I ask you this, why is it not ok to be a stay at home Mom?  Why do we get the questions "what about yourself?" "When are you going back to work?"  "What about your career?"

Pardon my language but Fuck, yes with a capital F, my career.  Is working really for me? Am I getting some deep spiritual gratification writing up proposals or sitting in meetings?  Really people. No.

Then again, my work is not who I am. I´m not being defensive or poking at anything here.  But seriously, I´ve never taken work that serious. I did my best, 110%, gold star, employee of the month work but it wasn´t who I was.  I just never felt that kind of connection to a line of work. Then again, I wasn´t saving the world, in any sense.

So I don´t get why letting your husband earn the living is an issue.  Because, let´s be honest, it´s an issue out there.  I mean, my husband isn´t going to work worrying about what I´m teaching his kids.  I could be telling them his Mother is Satin for all he knows.

I´m not by the way, I swear.


That´s the thing. I have two little future in my hands.  I´m the man behind the curtain in the lives of these two little guys.  So I ask you, who´s job is more important. Mr. Rant will be the first to say mine.  My kids are happy, well adjusted (if you consider calling everything poop well adjusted as I do) young boys.  And I take full credit.  Ok, not really, I have that all star husband who comes home and helps with the kids. Only the kids. Just saying.


Anyway, I want to pick them up from school. I want to bake cookies with them afterward. I want to call and bitch to my childless friends about how nice it´d be to have just one free 24 hour period, although secretly I´d be thinking about them the entire time.


I am used and abused and am on call more than any ER doctor.  24/7 baby.  And I love it.  It is about the quality of life just as Jim says. 


All that being said, I know a number of Moms who need to work, and they Rock! You can do it all, seriously. You may be more beaten down than JLo´s panties but it can be done. And I love them for it! 


Thankfully, I don´t have to choose between life and home just yet. We can live a little leaner and stay a little Mommy happier.  I think that fits just fine right about now.

Do I stay or Do I go now?

The strangest thing happened to me today, my English student proposed that I work for him.

Apparently, he´s looking for an executive secretary and asked me to name my price. Really? Name my price? $1 million dollars! 

Ok, I didn´t go that far.  I asked him what the hours were and he said that I didn´t answer the question. Well how am I going to answer the question if I don´t know anything about the job!

So I said R$5,000 a month.  Just fell out of my big old mouth.  He said could be.  Could be?  Is that before or after taxes? Can I ask for more?

But that is, seriously, a difficult question to answer. In my mind, he´s asking me how much life as I know it is worth? 

It´s priceless!  Of course I´d like to play with the idea and R$5,000 a month is nothing to scoff at.  But how could I part with my boys?  I can´t help but feel that the increased financial ease would calm a section of my and my husband´s brains but not benefit our kids.  It breaks my heart to think of them in school full time. 

Get a Nanny!  Oh I see how it is. Of course it would be cheaper than paying for full time school and they could, more or less, continue with life as normal.  But it wouldn´t be Mom. Call me an egomaniac but it would kill me to have someone else taking my kids to the park or helping them get dressed. 

I want to be here when they are sick. I want to be able to keep them home if they really don´t feel like going and I don´t have class. And I just really want to be around.

Of course I´m being all dramatic before I even have a job offer. It was just something put out there for consideration.  I mean, I don´t write well in Portuguese (which I mentioned) and I have no experience as an executive secretary.  Of course, that has never stopped me before.

And yes, my kids would be fine. Kids all over the world are at school/daycare while their parents work and they don´t have any more complexes than anyone else.  

The funniest part of all, I didn´t think he enjoyed our classes or liked me that much at all. Don´t get me wrong, we get along great but he always has something to say something.  You know what I mean?

Well, go figure.  Just when you think you might be slipping, you get a good review. 

Thoughts?

Great 4 hrs off

So I generally get 4 hrs off a day when both boys are at school. Keep in mind that I teach 2 of those afternoons and have to make lesson plans sometime before those two days.

Needless to say, I rarely feel pumped after my 4 hrs off. I never seem to get anything quite done. 

Well, today is different. I decided I was going to spend the time going around and pre-ordering the food for my oldest´s birthday party on Thursday.  Imagine my surprise when it only took 40 minutes!  No errand has ever taken me that little time in Rio! And I even had to go to 3 different places. 

Well, that meant I had to work.  Well, my mind, fingers, and keyboard took the busting out seriously because it only took me around an hour! And I was having an email convo with a very entertaining friend and periodically checking Facebook at the same time. Go figure. 

So I called a Mommy friend of mine and we´re going to go enjoy some nachos at the little Mexican place down the street from my place before we have to pick the small ones up from school.  Sweetness!  Stop if you are thinking I´m so lucky to have a Mexican restaurant near my apt because it´s more like Tex Mex.  Oh who am I kidding, I´d take a Mexican selling Brazilian hot dogs at this point!

And to top it all off, I already have dinner planned.

Guys, I´m on fire today!  If I get laid I just may blow up.

May the Force Be With me

I´m one lucky lady today.  Not only do I have to work but it´s raining and I get to go to downtown (centro) Rio de Janeiro. I know you all want to be me right now.

The funnest part about Centro and rain is that the drainage is horrible.  There are large and deep puddles everywhere. Add to it the fact that it´s not the cleanest neighborhood of Rio de Janeiro and you have in your hands my Wednesday joy.

It´s like bobbing for apples only with your shoes and pant legs. Goodness knows what´s going to stick to the back of your jeans today Rachel!  You think you picked the shallowest part of the lake in the middle of the street only to find you hit puddle lottery and are shin deep. Score! 

The bestest part of the whole thing is that I´m meeting a new student.  I just hope that his first impression of me isn´t that I`m a drowned kitten, my whiskers usually throw people off.  Better yet, I may buy and show up in a poncho. It will only confirm my native speaker status. 

I used to mock Cariocas and their fear of the rain but now I see where they are coming from.  This beautiful tropical city is, ironically, not made for it.  The streets flood, the traffic is hell, and the people are cranky.  I think the city planner started his job during the dry season, at a Brazilian bbq, and after quite a few stupidly cold (brazilian phrase) chopps (drafts). 

Ah well, what can you do?  A girls got to eat, a girls got to work, and people need to learn their English. Thankfully I´m only only partially made of sugar and won´t totally melt.  Ohhhh, maybe that part is my saddle bags and it´ll just melt right off!  A girl can dream, can´t she.  I like to think of it as finding a silver lining. 

Stay at home Mom vs Go to work Dad

It all started with one comment made by my husband.  I do believe he realized it too, right after he said it. 

It wasn't his fault really.  We had a rough start to a busy day.  For starters, we have a 1 yr old with diarrhea. That means that I was up most of the night with him and my husband got up early with him so that I could get some sleep.  Mom up at night + Dad up super early = two exhausted adults. 

I was kind of complaining about everything I have to do and how exhausted I am today.  Daniel, being the helpful and caring husband he is, told me not to worry. He knows I'll figure everything out and get plenty of time to sit on the couch. 

Seems innocent enough, doesn't it.  Not at that moment. At that moment he was saying that all I do is sit on my ass.  Funniest part is that he totally got that right after he finished saying couch. But the damage was done.

We went back and forth and he declared the fight open with the oh so famous words "And you don't think my job is hard?!"

Gloves were on and we were in our corners. The contest had started. Who has it worse? 

Sitting here in my unbiased thinking chair, neither one of us.  The grass is always greener.  I do think I have a bit more manual labor going on at my job, which I so classily pointed out by saying he's not a miner or anything.  He sits at a desk!  I'd kill to sit at a desk all day some days!

He does have a lot more pressure at his job. If I slack and feed the kids chips for dinner, no one is going to say anything to me.  Not that I'd tell anyone!  He has deadlines, meetings, politically correct conversations, dress shoes, and a boss.  Hmmmmm

Point being. This is a winless argument where everyone just ends up going on with their day feeling like crap.  It's hard for him because he's at work all day and doesn't really get to relax when he first gets home.  It's hard for me because I don't leave the house without children and can't relax until late evening. 

Eh, it is was it is.  I'd hate to have to spend the entire day away from my kids.  I know Daniel hates that too... Damn it.  There's a slight chance that I could be wrong here.  Let's just keep this our little secret.