Thursday, November 18, 2010
Scream Free Flights?
The New York Times published an interesting article recently about flying, namely flying with kids. Well, let me rephrase that, it's actually about NOT flying with kids.
What's irritating is the line drawn between families and the childless. Hello, I want to be on your side! But if I fly on the child free flight, who's flying with the kids? Do the family flights come with chaperones?
In all seriousness, suck it up people! Yes, it's annoying to have a screaming kid on a flight. News flash, it's also annoying to their parents, not to mention embarrassing.
Well, that is unless they're that breed of parent who are afraid of their children. You can tell who they are because their kid throws a tantrum and they go "oh oh oh honey. Let's not... oh oh oh it's ok" To say I'm not a fan of that parenting style is like saying I'm not a fan of being run over by a car. It's a slight understatement.
And as much as I would like to call Ian Burford of Boston a self-important douche, it's not all the childless traveler's fault. We parents need to get on the ball. I travel internationally with my boys and I'm always prepared.
All principals must go out the window. If you are a no junk food parent, that can wait until they are off the flight. If you are a no medication parent and the flight is over 6 hours, do us all a favor and drug the little person if they start showing signs of raising hell. Hell, drug them before they can! We know our kids. Be honest with yourself. If little Johny is a pain in the ass, he's going to be a royal one when trapped on a plane. Prepare accordingly.
And Bribery is your friend on a plane. I bring one new bigger toy and numerous new little toys. Dance for the banana little monkeys! That's right, DANCE! Actually, it's sit still and be quiet for the banana but you get my point.
As for you childless bastards who have to be put out by everything because someone didn't tell you the world doesn't revolve around you, suck it up a little bit. It's like 6 hours out of your life. Deal. No one likes a whiner and you are starting to sound more annoying than the kids you are complaining about. I mean, bitch bitch bitch. Just get together and buy your own plane.
Oh, and don't assume all kids on planes are bad news. Every time I get on a plane with my boys, all the people around me have a panic attack. I have to talk them down off the ledge. My boys are awesome little fliers and I bust my ass to make sure of that. A little credit for the non-screamers would be nice, thank you very much!