Wednesday, November 17, 2010
Yes, I'm writing about Penises
I fell over laughing when I saw this ad for XXL condoms online. Seriously, genius!
But it also got me thinking, which country has the biggest penis? If you ask any Brazilian man, they will say they are the biggest and/or have the most beautiful little men. That or they'll just offer to show you.
By the way, I do not recommend actually asking a Brazilian man unless they are securely tied down and you are out of the splash zone. Making eye contact for over a half a second is practically an invitation for sex. If you say the word penis you may get attacked or their head will explode.
Sadly, (Mr. Rant I'm only saying that for blogging purposes), I don't have a lot of experience in Brazilian penis measuring. Then again, this girl was so overjoyed that she married this one right away. I'm talking about the man, not the penis... ok, maybe both.
Now my single friends have had their fair share and, from what their gossip tells me, Brazilians rank right up there with the big boys. I know what you are thinking, maybe they were exaggerating. I'm sorry but here are four things you should know about women: 1. We are pretty honest when it comes to what our mate is packing, at least to our close girlfriends. 2. We are always honest about what a hook up is packing. 3. We have told all of our friends about both types. 4. If your wife/girlfriends say she has never talked about your package and or skills, she is lying. By our second drink out with our friends, it's ALL we talk about.
So I decided to do some research and I found this chart. It was particularly difficult for me to read it at first. I'm American so I have never learned about other countries' flags. Hey, at least I know they have them! Thank goodness for the source list.
I do have a problem with some of the numbers though. I'd like to first say, I am not racist. This is purely un-educated babble talking.
Anyway, I have an issue with the Lebanese measurement of 6.6 inches, .4 inches bigger than Brazilians and the same size as Ghana's 6.7. Really? What measuring tape were you using?
As for the Congo's 7.1 inches, I expected more... Overall, the averages seem a bit small. I guess you could say I've been a lucky girl.
And, finally, can we send out a virtual hug to South Korea please. Korea, don't worry, it's not the size of the boat. It's the motion of the ocean. I swear!
How realistic do you think this chart is?