I'm doing it again. I'm allowing myself to befriend other foreigners. Not an issue, right? Well yes, it is an issue.
You see, 85% of the time these foreigners leave. They stay for 6 months, 1 year, maybe 3 and then they bail.
Initially it was great just to meet some people who spoke my language. Later, I was the one left behind. So I decided to go Brazilian all the way! Brazilian friends and that is it!
Of course we foreigners are attracted to each other like white on rice and I managed to find some who actually live here. Finding other foreigners who didn't have a Brazilian expiration date was awesome to say the least. Of course, times are changing and the temporary expats are moving in like locus. Push came to shove and I ended up entering into an expat group. I blame the blog. The blog was the key to the world of Alice (expats) in Wonderland (moving to Brazil). I got emails, made contacts, and ended up in an expat Facebook group.
The thing is, I like these expats! The ones I have met are pretty damn awesome. Many of them move around all the freaking time. They are like nomads with a company credit card. I dig their worldly experience and open minds. I even dig the newbies, their questions, and their willingness to head out on a foreign adventure.
But they will leave. Their storm will soon form and take them away. I, however, will stay here and watch the sand settle. It sucks.
Of course, I've never been one to learn a lesson the first time around, just ask my Mother. I suppose I'd rather meet and miss cool people than not meet them at all.
So off I go back into the land of the traveling foreigner. Although I think I shall put a map up this time around. While the person may not be here, I could still have a little pin representing them and whatever city they originated in. That, my friends, would be quite interesting to see.
As a "here for good" expat, I have also watched friends leave. It is a part of life. Thankfully in this digital age, it is much easier to keep in touch long distance. And even though those friends are no longer living here, the friendship is still alive. Besides, depending on where you live in the US (D.C., for example), there is a lot of coming and going there too.
ReplyDeleteWould you agree that these expats have some characteristics that are absent in the general population and that you like these characteristics?
ReplyDeleteIf so then are the benefits worth the heartbreak?
I would answer yes. I think somehow I have learned to minimize the sadness and maximize the joy ( I can still laugh at some of the wacky adventures I had with expat friends as far back as 10 years ago). I guess in the end it is kind of a mind game you play with yourself.
Loved the Brazilian expiration date phrase: humor can be a healthy way of coping I think.
I'm a pre-newbie.....so I guess that makes me cool...
ReplyDeleteBut anyway, I completely can agree with what you are saying here. There is just something about people who are willing to put themselves in a completely foreign position that I admire. They are so worldly and they seem to be open to learn about other cultures and other people. They tend to accept that the way they do things back home may not be "the right way to do things."
I met a woman from the USA who lived in Brasil (Beaga) and said the quoted phrase above. It made me want to fall in love with her because it was the exact way I feel about the world.
People here tend to be very America-centric, which is fine and dandy, but When it's AMERICA ONLY I tend to get annoyed. Especially when people only think the way THEY do things is the right way. That's why expats rule! That's why I want to be one!
PS- This rant was in no way trashing America, just trashing the close mindedness that comes with 90% of the population that lives here.
Thanks Rachel! Your blog rocks!