What License Plate?!

Anyone who follows my blog on Facebook knows that I bought a dryer. I am over the moon. It is like losing my virginity with an orgasm, that is how long I have been waiting for this moment.

Of course, with that moment came the task of getting rid of my still good washing machine. It's 6 years old and washes, coincidentally, 6 kilos at a time. The first person I thought of giving it to is my twice a week maid. After years of conflict with her asshole (my word for him) father of her children, she is without a washing machine. He took it out of their place after she left him, like a fine young gentleman.

So I called Socorro (Portuguese for help but that is her name: Maria de Soccorro) after I purchased the new one. I told her that my washer is hers and, if possible, I would love it if she could bring my old one home the next day. She had it all arranged when she arrived this morning at my home.

Come 3pm, the pick up guy arrived with his truck. I had instructed the administration of my building that he would be coming and gave permission for his truck to enter the building to carry out our washing machine. The catch, he refused to identify himself to the doorman.

What?! Refuse to identify yourself and your car? Yes, we all know that many "movers" are not necessarily registered with the city. Socorro tried to explain this to him, that the building only required him to check in for the security of the people who live there. Regardless, he refused. I told her that I would personally go down and drive in with him. He drove away before I could get there.

That makes me think, what is this man avoiding? Socorro laughed. She said he was old, confused, and a little too cautious. I personally wonder why this man is avoiding identification.

To clear things up, I'm not really "worried." I don't think he's going to show up at my place with a gun and take my tv and fridge. He's like 65 yrs old and a friend of my maid. But the fact that he refuses to let my building write down his license plate number is something to make an American girl laugh.

The thing is that Brazil is changing because of the games coming here. Those who work with jeitinho, ie. not registered moving companies, may be concerned that they will be punished. Of course it's not like he's delivering to the US Consulate. Even then, I doubt they would say anything. Every country has their own way of running, and under the table help is nothing new to Brazil.

But I wonder if me being American and living in a heightened security building was enough to make this man not want the extra cash. Either way, Socorro and I had a laugh at the confusion .

Note to self, if I should ever have CIA access to foreign info, I would love to look up some of these peeps... just to see why the license plate info is so damn important.

Has this ever happened to you? 

Brazil's Perfect Polygamist Relationship!

Photo from the movie The Maid

I've been sticking my toes into the topic of polygamy quite a lot these days. It all started out as a joke on Twitter. Though like any puddle, the source of that water is much larger and pretty damn deep.

So when I stumbled upon an article about a lawsuit by a feminist polygamist, my ears started itching. What is this about? Turns out that she is fighting for her right to have the relationship she wants. She doesn't want legal status or right to property, she just wants the government to stay out of her business.

Obviously my mind then switched to Brazilian women and their maids. You don't see the connection? Let me point it out for you. It is the perfect non-sexual polygamist relationship!

Seriously! Take any married Brazilian woman who has kids and a full time maid. That maid runs the house for her, helps raise her children, and does all the shopping. The two women also bicker. Yes, the maid and the woman of the house will exchange words occasionally, the maid will totally undermine the Mother in front of the children if she feels it's necessary, and the Mother will generally accept it. They are two wives living together!

But why does it work?:

1. The maid doesn't get to sleep with the husband (at least that the wife knows of) but she does have to babysit the children.
2. The wife does not have to share the household income, only the allotted salary that was agreed upon.
3. You have two women who have learned to co-exist due to their own personal needs. This is a key point in any polygamist relationship.
4. You can add another maid without pissing anyone off! Most likely everyone will just be happier with the additional help.
5. No long skirts, poofed hair, or generally ugly garbs unless worn by personal preference.
6. Everyone is of legal age.
7. You can use birth control and only have to provide it for one person.
8. Equality is not an issue. Remember the maid's bathroom post?
9. If the relationship does sour, you can always look for a new sister/maid/wife.
10. It is culturally acceptable. 

Separate and Still NOT Equal

Photo from Brazilian Film Domesticas

I am surprised by how many people consider the lack of a maid's bathroom a deal breaker. Our apartment doesn't have one. We took it out to make our kitchen larger and chose to instead keep the good sized maid's room. I'll tell you this, many of those in the market for a 3 bedroom are not pleased.

And I don't get it! It's so separate but equal kind of crap. I have two other full bathrooms in my apartment. There is no shortage of places to drop the kids off at the pool. I felt it was excessive to keep a bathroom just for my maid. Who is she Madonna?

But many Cariocas do not approve, and I'm not just talking about the older ones. Families with small children have openly expressed their dissatisfaction in our decision. It has been discussed to the extend that I have started pointing out that our maid's room is large enough to have a small bathroom put in. That way it will feel extra prison like.

Ok, I don't say the last part.

Honestly though, it's starting to piss me off! These women are clean enough to cook for the family and feed the children but heaven forbid if they shower in the main bathroom?! Oh my Goodness, the insanity! And if anyone tries to say it's a convenience thing or that maids prefer it, just bite me. That is total bullshit. It's not like there's a line of impatient family members forming in my hall because my maid has decided today is her day to wax in my bathroom.

It's a freaking bathroom! Get over it!