Tuesday, August 2, 2011

Brazil's Perfect Polygamist Relationship!

Photo from the movie The Maid

I've been sticking my toes into the topic of polygamy quite a lot these days. It all started out as a joke on Twitter. Though like any puddle, the source of that water is much larger and pretty damn deep.

So when I stumbled upon an article about a lawsuit by a feminist polygamist, my ears started itching. What is this about? Turns out that she is fighting for her right to have the relationship she wants. She doesn't want legal status or right to property, she just wants the government to stay out of her business.

Obviously my mind then switched to Brazilian women and their maids. You don't see the connection? Let me point it out for you. It is the perfect non-sexual polygamist relationship!

Seriously! Take any married Brazilian woman who has kids and a full time maid. That maid runs the house for her, helps raise her children, and does all the shopping. The two women also bicker. Yes, the maid and the woman of the house will exchange words occasionally, the maid will totally undermine the Mother in front of the children if she feels it's necessary, and the Mother will generally accept it. They are two wives living together!

But why does it work?:

1. The maid doesn't get to sleep with the husband (at least that the wife knows of) but she does have to babysit the children.
2. The wife does not have to share the household income, only the allotted salary that was agreed upon.
3. You have two women who have learned to co-exist due to their own personal needs. This is a key point in any polygamist relationship.
4. You can add another maid without pissing anyone off! Most likely everyone will just be happier with the additional help.
5. No long skirts, poofed hair, or generally ugly garbs unless worn by personal preference.
6. Everyone is of legal age.
7. You can use birth control and only have to provide it for one person.
8. Equality is not an issue. Remember the maid's bathroom post?
9. If the relationship does sour, you can always look for a new sister/maid/wife.
10. It is culturally acceptable. 


  1. LOL, great post

    Can't wait for you to tell your Brazilian ladyfriends that you DO have a job, thank you very much, (we agree 100% here) and that they are in a polygamist relationship!!! You do know that Brazilian are genetically incapable of NOT taking things personally...

    No wonder you said "I would never cross a Brazilian woman! Fierce and in a good way :D.".
    You, miss, keep pushing the envelop! Guess you can't avoid it, and it is great for your blog is richer for it and funnier also... but did you consider taking Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu classes? ;)

    I guess the whole midle class can afford maid(s) thing is probably the biggest cultural shock you can experience while on Brazil...

  2. You are right! Throw in a couple nannies and you've got the makings of a series that is Bravo/TLC worthy. Perhaps you should consider the positive side - that the maid/nannies don't HAVE to sleep with the husband. Let's face it - not all men of means are beddable.

  3. I'm Mormon and this offends me.

    Just kidding.

    But funny none the less! I can't believe that nannies bicker with the dona da casa! That would be very interesting and fun to watch. Call me strange, but I like watching women fight/bicker. I find it hot. Dunno why.