Should Brazilians have Vergonha?

My Father-in-law came over this morning for a over breakfast visit with the boys and I. While he skimmed his paper he produced his unique ashamed and disgusted expression. (I really have to get a picture of it one day. It's adorable) He then stated:

"It is shameful how many ministers have been outed for corruption in this country!"

I understand his point.  Orlando Silva is the 4th minister to resign right? 5th? Oh wait nope, he's the lucky 6th to resign after scandalous allegations. Hell, who wouldn't be ashamed of their country after that?

Not me! I'm kind of stoked for Brazil. As opposed to the corruption just continuing, people are pointing fingers! Sure this guy has collected a pretty penny and probably owns more than 1 Toyota Corolla and all the Fisher Price toys available in Lojas Americanas. Who cares though because the game is over now... or in 30 days. Who's counting anyway?

The absolutely amazing thing is that they are all innocent, or so they say.  Obviously they are only resigning in order to protect their families and friends. President Dilma Rousseff even backed Brazilian Agriculture Minister Wagner Rossi when he was up against allegations.

“I regret the minister couldn’t count on the principle of presumed innocence,” Rousseff said in a statement distributed to reporters in Brasilia."

Presumed innocence? Come on. One example of what Brazilians are dealing with is when President Rousseff had to force the resignation of 20 officials at the transport ministry after an article in Veja claimed there had been kickbacks and overcharging. And you are asking the Brazilian public to presume innocence of anyone working for the government?

I hate to break it to you President Rousseff but I think anyone working in your government should be grateful that the public isn't demanding that cavity searches are performed at the end of each day.

None-the-less, Brazilians shouldn't be ashamed of this. This is Brazil moving forward and shaking the shit out of the trees. When I moved here it felt like corruption was expected and that there wasn't much you could do about it other then vote for a different party during the next election. Now it seems that the public is expecting answers and when there aren't any they expect the government to react.

Personally, I think that is a good thing. 

American Mail Order Bride

Image by: http://mocoloco.com/fresh2/2010/01/05/mail-order-bride-by-terry-borders.php

I'm just going to put it out on the table and say I was a mail order bride. I decided that I needed to leave the difficulties of my middle-class American life and be saved by a Brazilian.

Ok, maybe that isn't true but there is some truth to it.  I do feel that moving to Brazil saved me in a way. It saved me from a lifestyle that didn't suit me.

And I find that the more I adapt to living here, the less I'm asked by strangers as to why my husband and I chose his country over mine.  Of course there are some obvious benefits living in North America, but in the words of Jim, what about the quality of life?

Everything is a compromise, right? So here's what I compromised.

A good and inexpensive car for an ok car that gets us from here to there. While it would be nice to have something sporty, we don't use ours that much in the first place. We walk and use mass transit. The car gets us to places on the weekends and Mr. Rant to meetings where mass transit would be a bit of a bitch.

Ready made and frozen food for homemade and fresh foods. I'll be the first to say that this took some getting used to. I never thought I'd press this much freaking garlic in my life! Hell, dried beans used to scare me and now we buy and eat them regularly. Canned food? What's that? And you know what, I can feel the difference in my energy level, my regularity, and my weight. It also makes me happy to I know my kids are eating well. Sure that may not mean veggies daily but whatever they eat doesn't contain more preservatives than actual food.

Convenience stores/Target for Lojas Americanas. I really spend a hell of a lot less money in Brazil. There's little to no spontaneous shopping going on as it would cost a pretty penny.  I mean, do we really need more crap? As much as I love a good Target run, no we don't. Living here has lowered, slightly, the consumerism that is so a part of my blood.

Bottled drinks and snack packs for vendors. I love the cute little snack packs and juice boxes in the US. They are so practical. But you know what, I don't need them because I have vendor dudes selling anything from fresh coconut water to corn on the cob to popcorn anywhere I go. I can even get Popsicles!

Public Bathrooms for Brazilian Public bathrooms. Ok, this one is just sad. I still miss a good Starbucks bathroom on every corner. Here we have public bathrooms in the form of a moldy and urinated on, single man prison like boxes with toilets.

Good playground equipment for something from the 50s. Sure, I used get scared of my boys getting splinters in their little asses from the wooden slides, but it never happened. And there are some good parks, you just have to find them.  Some of the slides and stuff look like a death sentence but no one seems to be dying. Hey, you work with what you got. Of course, I'm the first to bitch about this but my boys have only slightly noticed.  They know that the playgrounds in Grandma's town are cooler but a playground is a playground. It's never stopped them from enjoying the ones here.

Disherwasher and dryer for at home help. I have to hand wash all dishes and hang my freaking laundry to dry almost every single day.  Of course I have a wonderful woman who comes into my home twice a week and cleans the absolute crap out of it. I doubt you could find one dead skin cell when she's done! I have never lived in this standard of cleanliness and I now know that every Brazilian living abroad thinks we are DIRTY!  Dirty dirty nasty little people.

And there's a lot more stuff but I let me say, there's nothing a good day at the beach can't cure! A very true Carioca saying! Even when I'm in a huge funk of I just want to hate Rio today, I go to the beach and think "holy crap, I live here!"  The view, the blue skies, the green of nature, the wonderful people, and the even better food. I really can't complain too much! 

De Montão is my hero

We spotted each other from across Lojas Americanas. It was love at first sight.  I approached, I am quite the instigator, and informed them that I was going to take them home!

De Montão!  Holy crap! It's my savor in this sea of mediocre junk food and tiny portions!  I know, Brazil has amazing food, all quite healthy. Why do you need chips? 

First of all, this isn't chips! This is a package containing not 1, but 3 types of chips! Doritos, Ruffles, and Baconzitos (bacon flavored pork rinds).  I've been dreaming of this moment since childhood. Of course, I didn't choose Baconzitos, it was pretzels, but it'll suffice.  I used to open 3 separate bags of chips, which my Mother must have loved, and mixed them up to make chip sandwiches. 

Now I don't have to. And there's enough fat in the small bag to satisfy this girl!  I can't help it. My stomach needs crap. I can only eat so much healthy food without getting a stomach ache.  I'm American for heaven's sake, a glorified Mutt. And this Mutt needs her trash! 

So I bought it and brought it home.  Oh my goodness, it was better than I imagined! And I'm not a huge fan of baconzitos but you really can't go wrong when you mix them with Doritos. 

I know it's sad. I dedicated an entire post to junk food.  What can I say, you can take the girl out of the trailer but you can't take the trailer out of the girl. 

I have to vent

This seems to be the week foreigners are pissed off at Brazil and Brazilians alike. I have joined the club today. I swear, they are all out to get me!

It started with a trip to an ears/nose/throat doctor for my youngest. I'm trying to figure out what's keeping him up at night crying. Mommy doesn't help, bottles don't work, coming to our bed does nothing.  It's a nightmare.  So the doctor calls us in and spends a whole 30 seconds with us. Of course he has me sign the insurance papers first, looks in my kid's ears, and tells me I have to go to a hospital and have them check him out. Hello, I could have done that in the first place you dumb ass.  Go there, get some random x-rays and check something else, blah blah, they'll know what to do.  He didn't even ask about his history.  I've asked for the little insurance payment paper back before but I was too tired to do it today. He technically checked him so screw it. I just won't be going back. 

It really was too good to be true to have an ENT near my place covered by  my insurance. I should have known!

So I gave up on that. Ears are clean, maybe my kid just likes to be a little bit of an asshole at night. Yes, it is ok for a mother to lovingly refer to their child as an asshole when they wake up 4 to 5 times a night and no one can find anything wrong with them. It's also a little disturbing seeing that we can't seem to make him feel better.  So if there is nothing wrong and he just doesn't want us to make him feel better, just wants to cry, whine, and scream, he is being a bit of an asshole.

So to continue with my hour of Brazilian hell.  My husband and I have been thinking of putting him in a big boy bed since he hates his crib. It hasn't always been this way but seem to be the theme now. He loves his brothers bed so let's try.  I'll try just about anything after 18 months without sleep (minus the 1 week 2 months ago so he is capable). 

I am looking for a guardrail for the bed.  Many stores have them online. Normally, you'd be able to assume that theses large stores would also have them in stock at their individual locations.  It'd be nice to be able to call and check. It's hard when their phone lines are disconnected. All of them!  And the online help number can't help you. You need to check with the store at whatever location you want to go to.

So I went to the store with my exhausted 18 month old. I finally found someone to help. She said they are in the baby section.  I controlled myself and did not say, duh I already checked there and they aren't any. That's why I'm talking to you. 

She brought me back over in case I'm actually blind and hadn't realized it.  Nope, none. I asked, again, if she could check the stock room or call a stock person and double check.  I was at Lojas Americanas by the way. We have one of the few non-express stores here in Laranjeiras. The few times I've managed to get someone to check in back, they've found what I've needed. She ignored me and walked away.  Well, I guess she still gets an A for effort for walking 3 feet and pointing to the baby stuff. 

I thought about running to the mall but the last thing I need to do is drive in this city in this mood.  I would so end up taking out a moto delivery guy or a taxi. 

Rio de Janeiro and Brazilians win today.  There are just some days where I wish it was easy to get stuff done!  I wish I could just run to the bank and not end up waiting for 2 hrs and seeing 2 different account managers because my specific account manager is on vacation and you can only do stuff with your manager, and crap like that. 

Screw dinner tonight. I'm ordering pizza.