I´ll be the first to admit that I´m really not one who can talk a lot of shit about fashion faux pas. My attempt at fashion is buying the newest color of Havaianas available.
That being said, even I´ve noticed what´s going down on the streets in Rio. There are so many fashion nightmares that you can´t walk one city block without getting an eyefull of something wrong.
But fair enough, right? While usually quite stylish, some Cariocas just dress to the beat of their own drummer.
Well, I just can´t let one thing go. I just can´t. It drives me insane. You know which one it is?
THE MUFFIN TOP!
I hate it! I want to liberate those poor suffering waistbands and let the extra skin fly! Don´t get me wrong now, this has nothing to do with the size of the person. The mindblowing thing about the Carioca muffin top is that it comes all sizes, from XXS to XXL. The clothes are just too freaking small!
Seriously, if you are a Carioca and you are reading this post, look down at your waist. Is your ass trying to escape via the back of your pants? Your abdomen reaching down and zipping up your jeans for you? If so, it´s a muffin top situation.
And it´s gotten serious. I worry for my kids safety. If they should get too close to some of the muffin tops roaming they city, they could drown. All they´d have to do is look up.
It´s almost an epidemic.
I was in Victoria's Secret the other day, and I was told by the salesperson that a muffin top is the fat that oozes out on the side of a woman, between the armpit and bra band. Nice. She added that every woman, even a thin one, has at least a bit of a muffin top due to the pressure of the bra band.
ReplyDeleteI wasn't aware that there were 3 types of muffin tops! (including the real ones on real muffins!)