Attack of the Mommy Brain

I so have little motivation to write. Actually, I have a lot of motivation to write but little to write about. I´ve been on full Mom mode since Tuesday. Mr. Rant was prisoner in a hell of a place called São Paulo working.  He was then stuck working in an even worse spot this weekend, Barra!

Yes, I do suffer from Zona Sul elitism. Actually, it´s worse. I bascially enjoy my neighborhood and the surrounding ones best.  You can even count Leme.  I like Leme. They have pools on the beach for my boys.  I mean, pools on the beach! That´s as evil genius as you get!  The sand of the beach with the convenience of a kiddie pool.

See, see where my mind is. My head is wrapped around juice boxes and poopy diapers, kiddie toys and parquinhos (parks).  You really can´t get that sarcastically sassy when you are searching for a shovel.  What can I say, my hands are tied with Playdoh and bristle blocks.

Not to worry, it´s Monday and a new week! Oh wait, the school will be shut Monday, Tuesday, and Friday.  It´s closed Tuesday for whatever the hell Catholic Saint´s day it is and on Monday because Tuesday is a holiday. That just burns my butter. What the hell is that? You can´t just make Monday a holiday because Tuesday is one!  Then the school looked at me, put up a talk to the hand hand, and asked me what the hell I was going to do about it. 

Well I´m going to bitch on my blog! So there! I´m taking my ball and I´m going home. 

Yeah, basically I took it where they wanted to put it. They are also closed Friday for Teacher´s day. That is another load of poop.  I consider Teacher Day like Father´s Day. It´s a day for them to spend with the kids. Now Mother´s Day is also a Day for Dad to spend with the kids.  Like that, don´t you?

Daring to sound fuzzy and positive, I have been enjoying my little monkey. Not a derogatory term, I did, in fact, give birth to little monkeys!  We´ve gone to every playground imaginable, cooked together, finger painted, regular painted, played everything possible, and snuggled.  I´m not stupid, I know they are at the age where Mommy is cool and they want to hang with me. Soon enough they will get delusional and think I´m not cool. Crazy, I know! 

Happy Monday!

Sexy Momma

The ants go marching three by three, hurrah, hurrah
The ants go marching three by three, hurrah, hurrah
The ants go marching three by three,
The little one stops to climb a tree
And they all go marching down around the town

That pretty much sums up my life as a whole. It's the three of us, me and my two sons, marching around town getting stuff done. There's not much variety to our day to day life unless you count going to a different park as shaking things up. All and all, I don't mind. I think it's the little things that make a difference, i.e. the odds and ends.

I had a little thing happen yesterday. It's a very little thing so don't go and get your hopes up for some exciting story. I was winked at on the street.

Oh I know, no big deal. But here's the thing. He was hot and he wasn't old. Yes, older men can be hot sometimes but not the case with this guy. He was hot, I'd say in his late 20s or early 30s, and kind of a bad boy type. Let's also keep in mind I was cruising the street with my bad ass double stroller and my two little men. Now one could debate that this guy must be a bit of a bastard to be winking at Mommies cruising around with their kids. Also not the case. I pass this guy once or twice a day. I've always noticed that he's pleasing to glance at but that was it... until now. He winked at me!

This really means nothing. Nothing will come of it except for my boosted self-esteem. Yes, just a wink. You see, I'm a Mom. I'm just a Mom running around with my two boys. I hardly have time to brush my hair, much less worrying about collecting even the smallest bit of attention from men. Not to mention, I'm married. Then there's the whole body image thing. I'm young but I have two kids.

So approaching 30 I'm starting to feel less than what I physically was before. My body just isn't the same and I am young. It makes me feel so unattractive. I should be tight and fit. Oh sure, go to the gym, eat right, take some time for yourself, blah blah blah. Let's be honest, after kids there are things the gym and a massage aren’t going to fix. For example, the boob issue. My poor beautiful little breasts. They are now like sad little balloons. You know the ones. The forgotten balloons still hanging from the wall days later. The shriveled and sad pink things that were once voluminous but are now depressing. Well, those are my breasts. Tiny little air sacks with playdoh like nipples. I'm not even getting into the nipples.

My point being, I don't feel sexy. I can't even fathom a man looking at me and thinking about sex. Hell, I can't imagine a man looking at me and thinking about me doing his laundry. That being said, I don't suffer from low self-esteem. I suffer from a realistic view point. I have no doubt that I attract my husband or that I'm of value. I'm just not the delusional 20 yr old I was once, prancing around in little skirts and tanks thinking I’m the shit.

Point being again, after all my yammering, it made my day. A wink. I had the heart flutter... Oh I was noticed! And he's someone that doesn't have to notice me! It's that simple. Needless to say, I felt a boost of sexiness, a natural sexiness that doesn't come from make up or clothes, and I propositioned my husband. I think I can say we're both happy I was winked at.