the wink just got creepier

So if you remember back to my first ever blog post, you'll remember the story of the wink.  Well, the wink has smoked some crack and gotten a little creepy.

Every time I run into this newspaper guy he gives me a smile that is a little too familiar.  That was ok.  I could blow it off as nothing but a slightly creepy guy.  Today he took it a step further.

Don't get your imagination going.  It's nothing huge.  I was walking by talking to my friend Sandi on my cell when I saw him an outdoor restaurant.  He was staring at me. He turned. And yes, he busted out the lean, smile, and wink.

Now I'm just offended. I'm a mother of two. I'm married.  What the hell is this guy thinking? There are two options: 1. she's available or 2. she's a whore.  Ok, maybe I'm making it a bit black and white.  I wear a ring but my husband is never cruising the streets with the boys and me during the day.

Regardless, I was trying to be nice. I never reacted to any of these things. I wasn't rude nor was I nice.  I think I may have to be rude. I'm going to channel my inner Carioca (brazilian born in Rio) woman and give that OMG how dare you, you bastard face. You all know it.

On the bright side, I still got it. Ok, for a creepy guy but still counts.

Sexy Momma

The ants go marching three by three, hurrah, hurrah
The ants go marching three by three, hurrah, hurrah
The ants go marching three by three,
The little one stops to climb a tree
And they all go marching down around the town

That pretty much sums up my life as a whole. It's the three of us, me and my two sons, marching around town getting stuff done. There's not much variety to our day to day life unless you count going to a different park as shaking things up. All and all, I don't mind. I think it's the little things that make a difference, i.e. the odds and ends.

I had a little thing happen yesterday. It's a very little thing so don't go and get your hopes up for some exciting story. I was winked at on the street.

Oh I know, no big deal. But here's the thing. He was hot and he wasn't old. Yes, older men can be hot sometimes but not the case with this guy. He was hot, I'd say in his late 20s or early 30s, and kind of a bad boy type. Let's also keep in mind I was cruising the street with my bad ass double stroller and my two little men. Now one could debate that this guy must be a bit of a bastard to be winking at Mommies cruising around with their kids. Also not the case. I pass this guy once or twice a day. I've always noticed that he's pleasing to glance at but that was it... until now. He winked at me!

This really means nothing. Nothing will come of it except for my boosted self-esteem. Yes, just a wink. You see, I'm a Mom. I'm just a Mom running around with my two boys. I hardly have time to brush my hair, much less worrying about collecting even the smallest bit of attention from men. Not to mention, I'm married. Then there's the whole body image thing. I'm young but I have two kids.

So approaching 30 I'm starting to feel less than what I physically was before. My body just isn't the same and I am young. It makes me feel so unattractive. I should be tight and fit. Oh sure, go to the gym, eat right, take some time for yourself, blah blah blah. Let's be honest, after kids there are things the gym and a massage aren’t going to fix. For example, the boob issue. My poor beautiful little breasts. They are now like sad little balloons. You know the ones. The forgotten balloons still hanging from the wall days later. The shriveled and sad pink things that were once voluminous but are now depressing. Well, those are my breasts. Tiny little air sacks with playdoh like nipples. I'm not even getting into the nipples.

My point being, I don't feel sexy. I can't even fathom a man looking at me and thinking about sex. Hell, I can't imagine a man looking at me and thinking about me doing his laundry. That being said, I don't suffer from low self-esteem. I suffer from a realistic view point. I have no doubt that I attract my husband or that I'm of value. I'm just not the delusional 20 yr old I was once, prancing around in little skirts and tanks thinking I’m the shit.

Point being again, after all my yammering, it made my day. A wink. I had the heart flutter... Oh I was noticed! And he's someone that doesn't have to notice me! It's that simple. Needless to say, I felt a boost of sexiness, a natural sexiness that doesn't come from make up or clothes, and I propositioned my husband. I think I can say we're both happy I was winked at.